Emily and Joey Go to China

Here I shall list things that my recently-recovered food poison-y self would love to eat right now.

1. Subway

Surprisingly enough, there is Subway in China. Although KFC and McDonald’s are probably the two most popular American fast food places here, Subway can still be found in the larger cities. When I visited the Terracotta Warriors, there was a Subway seated comfortably inside of the massive shopping area near the museum. I of course indulged myself in the surreal place, and was honestly quite surprised by its accuracy to its American counterpart. The cheese and bread both tasted vaguely different, but on the whole it was essentially the same. Even the Lay’s Potato Chips and Coca-Cola were similar! At any rate, I’ve been craving it ever since then. After a while, having spicy potato dishes and orange chicken for breakfast loses its luster.

2. A Real Cheeseburger

Like I said above, McDonald’s does exist here. I can honestly say now though that I have yet to have a full meal there, as both of the times I was near one, I chose to only pick at things. I sampled a burger, which tasted just like a McDonald’s burger, and ordered some fries, which were essentially spot-on. But to say I crave a real cheeseburger and then say a McDonald’s burger would suffice would be a real lie. That’s like saying you need a reliable car, but one made out of cardboard will do. So when I say I need a REAL cheeseburger, I’m talking one from Wagner’s Drive-In or a Juicy Lucy. Hell, even one my dad makes would make me happy (no offense, Pa).

3. Chipotle

Oh God Chipotle. What a double edged sword you are. Even though I’ve just recently recovered from food poisoning, I would put my stomach through three separate Hells just to have a Chipotle burrito inside of it. Just thinking about the tangy flavor the steak receives when it mixes with the tomato salsa…uuughh…I can’t think about it anymore. It’s too torturous.

4. Jack’s Pizza with Ranch Dressing

Many days before I would go to work at Hot Comics, I would indulge myself in a Jack’s Frozen Pizza with Ranch Dressing while I watched Maury for more time than any human should have to endure. Granted, neither of those things are good for the human body (Maury is probably worse for you), but China has the wrong kind of grease with their foods. It’s not the kind that comes off of a burger or nasty dollar pizzas; it’s the kind that’s bought in gallon sized jugs that say “Corn Oil” on the side. The amount of oils I’ve been ingesting concerns me, and what concerns me even more is that Oils and Vinegar seem to be the only things that come in gallon sized jugs. Finding jugs of clean water seems like it should be more of a priority. But back to the point, I need a pizza inside of me within the next week or you can expect to hear from me.

5. Cold Cereal

I had a conversation earlier with Righteous Ross (one of the teachers), and he brought up how awesome it would be to have some cold cereal. It immediately brought me back to the night when Joe Edmonds and I each had a massive bowl of Fruity Pebbles to obliterate some kind of need we had for them. That’s going to happen again when I get back to the States. I will have a plethora of cereals at my disposal for whenever I require them. Probably starting with Fruity Pebbles. Oh, and Skim Milk would compliment that beautifully. The milk here in China is very different. And by that I mean it isn’t pasteurized. And sometimes it has apple flavor in it. I’m not even joking. Apple Milk. It’s not that bad. But it wouldn’t taste good with Fruity Pebbles, despite what you might think.

So there you have it. 5 Foods I would like to have sitting in front of me right now. On the other hand, I think trading a pizza or a bowl of Fruity Pebbles for going to see the Forbidden City today is a pretty fair exchange.

Yoinks and Away!

-J

Good morning, people in China, and good evening people back home, 

Joey here with some horrid news; my butt has turned on me. At about 3 am last night I began to purge the most putrid poops out of my body and have not stopped yet. I don’t know if it was something I ate, or perhaps my body deciding I’ve had enough time in China, but nonetheless it is awful. As a result, I won’t be going to see the Buddha Paintings or the Hanging Monastery today. Insert my weepy face here. 

But fear not! More excitement has been rattling through China for us. Yesterday we departed from Huzhou on our way to Datong (which is where I am now). On our last night in Huzhou, one of the teachers brought us to a karaoke bar for a celebration. And by karaoke bar I mean karaoke penthouse. People here go all out for karaoke. I felt like an expensive prostitute in that room with the light up tables and long black couches. We had an awesome time though, jamming out to various American tunes that the Chinese people couldn’t understand. Probably the most enjoyable part though was the video going on over the lyrics for the American songs. Usually, karaoke videos are just the music video for the song, but not for the American ones apparently. We put on 50 Cent’s “In Da Club,” and were graced with lovely video of nature at its finest. While 50 rapped about how he’s not into making love he’s into having sex, a beautiful pelican soared over a soft lake. G-Unit and lovely mountainsides certainly go together now. 

Beyond that, it’s business as usual, as we Americans bravely go where probably many Americans have gone before; Beijing. We leave tomorrow to spend 3 nights there, and shop til we drop. For souvenirs. Yay. I mean YAY! After that, we leave at 8 am on Monday, and return at 12 pm on Monday. That’s right, we get to travel through time. AGAIN! 

And with that, it’s about time my sick self went back to bed. More naps and strange dreams are on the horizon, and I must greet them properly. 

TTFN, 

-Joey 

The boys are sitting in our hotel room in Huozhou drinking pineapple beer and giggling their asses off playing cards while I’m talking to our Chinese students on QQ and waiting for Northeastern Housing to email me back. 

Just another night in China :)

Whoof!

So yeah, it’s been a while since we posted. Let’s see what’s new…

We’ve left Fenxi in one of the most heartbreaking yet hopeful moments of my life. We got to see this kids grow from shy, reserved little tykes to gleeful young adults over the course of 10 days. It’s amazing how attached you can get to people who don’t even speak the same language, especially over such a short amount of time. Luckily, QQ will bridge any connections that would be lost over distance! Thank goodness for that. 

We’re now chillin’ in Huzhou, which is a fair amount larger than Fenxi, but still has a lot of the staring. I’ll never get used to that, especially since there have been a few moments when cars will stop next to us on the street and the driver will point to the passenger seat as if saying 

“Get into this car. Now.” 

Luckily, we now know how to say no which is “boo.” So if you ever find yourself in China and someone is saying “Boo,” don’t think they’re trying to scare you. You’re probably doing something stupid. 

Yesterday, we embarked on an adventure that involved climbing a mountain. Yeah. That’s right. A mountain. It was pretty intense, and there was much sweat that left my body at a rapid rate. I now have a designated shirt for stanky excursions, but when I get home, it’ll be up to you to guess which one! Hint: Smelling them might help.

I didn’t go too far up the mountain, as it seemed to be a never ending trail upwards, but once I got to the top of a waterfall I felt a certain satisfaction that signified the end of my climb. Joe, Chris and Ryan, a few tour mates, managed to climb far enough where they could see steam rise off of their bodies. Eat your heart out, Rambo. 

Today we went to what was described to us as “a mansion,” but a more accurate description would have been “private village.” Essentially, a family known as the Wangs (hold your childish giggling, please) has had this HUGE estate for the last 17 generations, and has opened it for tourist enjoyment. It was amazing. The intricate carvings on all of the different corners and borders signify a large amount of wealth, and the complexity to all of the different areas was just jawdropping. There were multiple spots that looked about the size of an average American house all put next to each other making an almost labyrinth compound to everything. The coolest part, at least in my opinion, was the walled in perimeter with pagodas at all of the corners. After climbing to the top corner of the perimeter and getting a bird’s eye view of everything, you really could understand how much hard work went into constructing this entire estate. Emily’s architecture mind went reeling. She honestly looked like a kid at Christmas. ADORBS. 

Tomorrow, we begin our 6 hour bus ride to Xi’an for the day and night, where we’ll get to see the Terracotta Warriors and take in Big-City China. Then the day after we head back to Huzhou before going to see the Buddha paintings and the Hanging Monastery. After that, it’s on to Beijing for a few days to see things like the Forbidden City and Tiananmen Square before we head back Stateside. EXCITING!

Well, we have to pack now for our overnight trip to Xi’an, and Dumb David is knocking rudely at our door, so I have to go deal with things. Goodbye Tumblrverse! Zai Jian! 

-Mie Jie

(Joey)  

thebrookepaynter asked: I MISS YOU! when are you skyping people?! So amazing, so jelly, I WANT TO KNOW EVERYTHING!!!! :D be safe, have fun!

We miss you too, Brookford-Upon-Avon! We’re 13 hours ahead of all ya’ll, so plan accordingly in that regard. Otherwise, it’s really up in the air when we’re available. It’s a good idea to just have yourself set to online whenever you’re on the computer, and maybe, juuuust maybe, you’ll catch a wild Chinese Tourist! 

craftychink asked: want moar pix. :P

Aw, you’ve been here before, go away.

Hehe, just kidding! We have many pictures that don’t belong to us that we’ll post soon. Fear not, kiddies.

Right here right now, I’m gonna post all of the random things about China that stick out to me. Deal? Deal. 

• Michael Jackson is still alive. Or at least his music still is. Kids go nuts for it. 
• The pop cans all still have the old opening style. The kind where you have to pull back and peel it off? Old folks know what’s up. 
• Facebook, Twitter and a lot of chat services have been blocked. QQ now owns the reigns for social networking, and ironically enough it’s a combination of the 3. 
•  The idea that Chinese products are made “cheaply” is almost ridiculous. The pop cans are all IMPOSSIBLE to smash. 
• Dirty on the outside, clean on the inside is a well established thought. People throw rubbish down the ravine next to our hotel or even into the drainpipes, but every house I’ve been in so far is astonishingly clean. 
• Pets are not thought of in the same fashion here as they are in America. If you own a dog, it’s normal to not name it and let it sleep outside every day and night and feed it scraps. My ASPCA commercial watching didn’t train me for this. 

And there you have it! Just some random facts and observations about Chinese life. Stay tuned for some photos, and maybe even a video that was put together by one of our lovely travel buddies! 
Stay classy. 
-J 

dansunreve-deactivated20120318 asked: i miss you both :(

So skype us rather than sitting on Tumblr all day.